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Born To Relax

by Recreational Episiotomy

BORN TO RELAX INTRO (aka MAKE THEM DIE SLOWLIER) Born to relax PIG SCREAM HOLIDAY; TU SEI UN BASSO BEDPANZ You are a low pitale U-R-L-O maiale Yule sorrow Natale U-R-L-O maiale
He's part conscious, he knows what's in store He knows just when we start the third World War He's waking up to his history - the birthday that will live in infamy The nightmare to end all nightmares Spooky action at a distance Physics offers up no tangible resistance Atomic bomb, mind transfer Someone in 1945 has been left with the answers
Fill me, shake me, either way you want me Blue Mummy on a motherfuckin' mission Gotta see what'll fit in the coffin The hinges of the tomb worn down from the years It's where I keep the candy; it's where I keep the candy. Where I keep the candy? Where I've always kept the candy!
Trip on Nippon, dog - please never change Trip on Nippon, dog - please never change Trip on Nippon, dog - please never change Oddly specific The stench is terrific The schoolgirl is young - tonguing young puppy bung
IN-A-PRO-PRIA-VIDA In-a-pro-pria-vida I am - inappropriate BUG PARTS Mysterious horror tubes in yeasty clothing The color of death in a cross-section of suffering Phallic filth in a child's hands Cultivating a tolerance for mustard gas Permissible bug parts Permissible rat shit
491 = D-IX Five parts mineral - meaning to rock Three parts chemical - perverted shock Five parts vegetable - sugar on cock Yummy en bloc, it goes GO GO GO GO DURR HURR D'ÊTRE BÉBÉ Le parfum des problèmes d'essuyage †FINGER Crossfingercrossfingerdrivebyfingerdrivebyfingerbigbang It's an exchange of sentimental symbols I tell the mark of your beast to go fuck itself
a) VOMAN ROMIT Voman Romit b) KKK2D2 KKK2D2 c) LIKE A BABY'S DICK FUCKING AN APPLE Like a baby's dick fucking an apple / APPLE d) OFF A PIG FOR THE SAKE OF MY SEX LIFE Off a pig for the sake of my sex life Off a pig for the sake of my sex life - PIG e) THE ARYAN CHRIST AS BIRTHDAY CLOWN The Aryan Christ as birthday clown f) POCKET-DIALING THE VICTIMS They heard me boast about last night's roast of actual baby back ribs
Shit out my mouth with the sun in my face Indian-style on carpet arson-charred Blasting mustard water in summer A disgusting miracle of digestion in the summertime
Taint misbehavin' Scissors or a razor A relaxing expedition into sickness, a few laughs Making one from two It's just something to do: Detaching the partition Make a (w)hole out of two halves So it is her objective to remove what's connective Self-mutilation Goddess be: Recreational Episiotomy Leisure endeavor, tissue to sever - It's usually entertaining; self-inflicted Making two to one, something just for fun Unusually agonizing Pain-addicted So it is her objective to remove what's connective One hole remains for sodomy Recreational Episiotomy
Tucker State Prison Farm telephone line Magneto to the Speedo
I’m Hitler in the boobyhatch A fleeting breed of locust Fucking on the barrelhead is only stealing focus Cheap sex on the barrelhead Cheap sex on the barrelhead
We were hanging out downtown in Rage-Town's living room He suddenly suggested, "Blackened Testicles In My Womb" I countered, "Burn a Fatty with a Noose Around Your Neck" Then "Bark at the Toilet and Barf at the Moon" was next Here's some further titles that I won't write lyrics to: "Cold Cum Balloons", "Skin Salad", and "I Totally Nailed This Jew" "When You Think of Muff, Think Diver", "Wild Vagina Rider", and "Tupac Died in the Valkenvania Mine Fire"
Another hacky douche trying to hog the camera lens Barreling through and huffing that which was intended to cleanse Secure a cure from ROTC and rock, high cornering entrepreneur The crock and rot, the torr and cock are bordering on the obscure
You raise a baby You praise, perplex it Then kill the bratty Betray, inject it Kill it, kill it! Kill it with your DICK Winsome, the pieces Sew back the parts Live with the stitches in a pattern of h***ts Then you KILL IT with your DICK
NAD PUMP OFFLINE Nad-pump not found ZURN Zurn TITS TO THE MUD Tits to the mud, señor / tits to the MUUUUD X-WORDED N-RATE X-Worded N-Rate QUIM DINNER Quim dinner, Me getty so hungee baby Getty so hun-gee, 'cuz... TRÉS DOABLÉ She's trés, trés do-ablé, do-ablé BR'ER STEREO My br'er stereo
Picking your poison It's thickened, it's roiling It's rollicking follicles - much too loud Distracting your hackles - much too loud Pay, own, ace. Con mayola, no esta sola.
Big deal, I saw the moon - I'm really just surprised I wanna find out who the fuck would take a pizza pie and throw it straight in someone's eyes Yeah, I see the stars - so I will make a wish: To meet the foolish fool who uses foolish drool to sauce a foolish pasta dish Tutte le vostre base Nemmeno Doom musica Il Mr.T Italian mangiato mi... Tutte le vostre base Nemmeno Doom musica Il Mr.T Italian mangiato mi palle
PAP REEK Down the hatch with a shit-covered cock Down your chin, cold sweaty ball rot Greenish turd up inside urethra Hairy cream tang, cumin and paprika Fuck you, alligator Eat shit, crocodile Shut the fuck up, alligator Suck my cock, crocodile SIPPY Walk Choppin' up a stick o' chalk Sippy, chokin' down a cuckoo cock Sippy sup in Kona cup I'm having trouble when I talk 't'oughtta be obvious shock It's a California four o'clock Sippy sup I'm having trouble with my breathing Vapor lock
The role of Poe has gone to Keanu
THE $25,000 PYRRHIC VICTORY What's to be afraid of? You grow your own protective headgear. Things That Someone Digging In Their Heels Might Say. I WANNA BE POISONED Initiate of the vomit league The spine of a boxer and the carny's hammers Darkness is a wheel Electrified fatigue, fatigue, fatigue JELLY TOURNIQUET It's illogical as hell But predictable as fuck It's a well-lit shopping mall It's a hop skip and a jump ICONIC JUDO AS SEX MoOn fly meGa snIff manhooD-hatInG tWaTs OMen loaf Gym snIff leDgE oN into hoTs rum FeeS idioTic We In it, ToaD eYe - I discusS it CyAnide's very borEd soleMnly flaKinG TyPhoid TeEn nada tiN hooF revoLTing AGony season Jaw
Smell the bile comin' up my throat Smell the stale smoke on my coat Fragile and helpless as a kite Gotta gotta get a Pharsley Premacy tonight "Bob" - SNED-MOAR-THEM pilspilspilspilspilspilspilspilspilspilspils I didn't overdose, I'm overdosing O blessed oblong curse, o blessed oblong curse Liver chalkboard The leak smells burnt and it wasn't even worth it
I'll tell you what I'd rather do (RAWR) I'd rather fingerlick the Colonel Amok, he cried sick and, unlucky, died stricken. I'd rather fingerlick the Colonel CHICKEN CHICKEN CHICKEN CHICKEN Fingerlick the Colonel
That's not really a blast beat That's not really a blast beat You're physically incapable of one You cannot be an artist in this genre if you can't keep up with a Gatling gun GUUUUUN A computer - you fed it your drumming detritus You'll rely on edits due to tendonitis
I set out to write some lyrics with intent to sicken Violent gore and nothing more is what I should have written But the worst I wrote was "carbonated Ragu sauce" ...that's not really grindcore
Pamphletries 00:39
When are you cosmic cowboys gonna get it through your head? Smoking in a human face; are we really so dis-paired? When are you cosmic cowboys gonna get it through your head? Humble saucer of my race; you will never be prepared!
This is my housekeeper and her name is Aroma Spinnbarkeit, tú es loco loción Checking for some endometrial carcinoma Spinnbarkeit, tú es loco loción My little baby sister pronounces the H Her feminist hero was Bessica Medlar Raiche So come on, come on, make secretion rainbows with me.
a) EYEFUCKING YOUR CASKET Eyefucking your casket b) TIE-DYED COFFIN Sagebrush and sweat and brightly colored foreign objects Extreme fundamentalists living in mold c) FULLY TURGID I drink in your embarrassment like S/M piss d) TAINT OF DELECTATION (UK SURF) She pushed me up against the wall She found a treat behind my balls e) YEN ON FIRE IN A VIRGIN'S MOUTH Yen on fire in a virgin's mouth f) SPENT FUCKBAGS Spent fuckbags
NO HABLA QUEEF No habla queef The pussy air is leaky Cunny fart language me no speakee Words from lips without any teef I don't understand No habla queef T.D.I.T.V.M.F. Tupac died in the Valkenvania mine fire
(A) "Taser An Infant" (B) "The Pedialectro-Disruptor" (C) "Neuromuscular Naptime" (D) "Infantiquassus" - infant taser
PAROXYSM OF BLOODLUST Been a month of Sundays since I HAD ONE. This is a particularly BAD ONE. Shower down upon whom it is DONE TO. Scimitar and hammer, rope and GUN TOO. RECREATIONAL EPISIOTOMY: MIAMI Stash away the 'band in a utility knife Behold, a drilling company; the rig is his wife RecEpis: Miami 4 LYFE Everybody gather 'round an old magazine Consortium is powered by the lickin'-it-clean It's the Kickin'-It-Team on a rickety beam RecEpisRecEpisRecEpisRecEpisRecEpisRecEpis
Я Toys Us? 00:56
Hey man, what's the deal? Tell the truth, baby - is love real? Hey man, what's the deal? TOYSUS CHЯIST TOYSUS TOYSUS CHЯIST TOYSUS CHЯIST Daren't thar be fuck? Is it recognized? Shall we saddle up? Is it made of lies? Is it blood or luck filling up the shaft? Don't you just secrete to ease a couple laughs? Interactive drama queen cheapening Retroactive reimagining Devastate the heavenly memory Renovate the fate of our history
Mike Bender's underwear on eBay Return to sender, service rendered, whattaya gonna say Pissing up a typhoon and working all day Mike Bender’s underwear on eBay
( ) 02:44
(changing channels on the TV in the waiting room of the bonus tracks department)




released December 21, 2011

All music and lyrics by Recreational Episiotomy except FLYING BLACK WIDOW ENEMA, EYEFUCKING YOUR CASKET, ZURN, FULLY TURGID, TAINT OF DELECTATION (UK SURF) and FRUIT OF THE DOOMED co-written with Noah Nelson


Disturbo - Voxmitcals aka HOWLIN's AND HOLLERIN's
Victor Óðr - Drugs & Percussion
Sixto Ridenhour - Tyco Hot Lixx and other electronic guitar-themed devices; also guitars
Grody Horten - Bass guitar on loan from Chorus Barloff
Pork Area - Wurlitzer Total Tone Deluxe 625, Yamaha PSR-500m, all other pianoellany
Liquid Smoke - Drum programming = DRUMP
Serge Austenflög - The Shitar (original 2-string left-handed whammy model) and The Shitar II (1-string bass & 2-string ukelele combo)
Seimer Litengame - Film, TV, video game repurposing
Ferrin Bouchetti - Cuatro and accordion and as long as it sounds foreign
Lucius Ergo - Banjo +CHEATER STYLE+
Allman Dabbel - Halitosis harp and two similar cowbells
Tanny Meltzer - Telephone bells, coconut mbira, frog caller, and all other humorously obscure percussion
Jason David Cox - Plenipotentiary

Matt Attaq - saxophone sample on 2
Teresa Cox - nylon-string acoustic guitar on 1a, taxi horn on 10
Nick Kerkenides - phonecore vox on 15
Noah Nelson - additional guitars on 1a, 20, 31a, 31c, 31d, 37

Mike Bender, Cherry Twink, Nick Kerkenides, Noah Nelson, Glenn Newport, Penny P, Jason Shoelace, Damian Sol, Steve Sullivan

Barry White blooper tape; Big; Charly Stuang Stabalac from The Don & Mike Show (WJFK); Weird Science; Christopher Guest on Saturday Night Live; Troll II; Dean Martin "Caddy" blooper tape; Don Geronimo from The Don & Mike Show (WJFK); Rush Associated Labels Recordings promotional sampler “Faces of Def”; Firesign Theatre “I Think We're All Bozos On This Bus”; Fishbone "Babyhead"; Spacecamp; George Carlin "Drugs"; GWAR "Fight"; Walk Hard outtake; Mr. Mike's Mondo Video; Silence of the Lambs; Wake Up, Ron Burgundy; Kevin Boom Boom Anderson (KRXQ morning show
circa 1992); Lights Out show #97 (06/29/1938) "The Chest"; Perry & Kingsley "Countdown at 6"; Public Enemy "Contract on the World Love Jam"; Richard Pryor on Saturday Night Live; Round Table Pizza commercial & many other television elements circa 1990; “Star Trek: Conversational Klingon” (audiobook); The Last Word: Dewey Cox; Tim & Eric Awesome Show Great Job!; A Clockwork Orange; Kingpin; X Minus One - "Time and Time Again" by H. Beam Piper (1/11/1956)

RICHARD (September 29, 1936 - June 4, 2010) AND
RYAN (June 11, 1977 – June 20, 2011)


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