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1. |
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BORN TO RELAX INTRO (aka MAKE THEM DIE SLOWLIER)
Born to relax
PIG SCREAM HOLIDAY; TU SEI UN BASSO BEDPANZ
You are a low pitale
U-R-L-O maiale
Yule sorrow Natale
U-R-L-O maiale
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2. |
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1. IN-TRO
G. LET'S GO!
3. ENNUI
4. (TH') FUCKING SHOW
5. SCURRY UP
6. MOVE YOUR BUTT
A. SALMOST OVER
D. WTF
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3. |
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He's part conscious, he knows what's in store
He knows just when we start the third World War
He's waking up to his history -
the birthday that will live in infamy
The nightmare to end all nightmares
Spooky action at a distance
Physics offers up no tangible resistance
Atomic bomb, mind transfer
Someone in 1945 has been left with the answers
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4. |
The Narcophagus
00:59
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Fill me, shake me, either way you want me
Blue Mummy on a motherfuckin' mission
Gotta see what'll fit in the coffin
The hinges of the tomb worn down from the years
It's where I keep the candy; it's where I keep the candy.
Where I keep the candy? Where I've always kept the candy!
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5. |
101 Dalmatians 1 Cup
00:34
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Trip on Nippon, dog - please never change
Trip on Nippon, dog - please never change
Trip on Nippon, dog - please never change
Oddly specific
The stench is terrific
The schoolgirl is young
- tonguing young puppy bung
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6. |
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IN-A-PRO-PRIA-VIDA
In-a-pro-pria-vida I am - inappropriate
BUG PARTS
Mysterious horror tubes in yeasty clothing
The color of death in a cross-section of suffering
Phallic filth in a child's hands
Cultivating a tolerance for mustard gas
Permissible bug parts
Permissible rat shit
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7. |
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491 = D-IX
Five parts mineral - meaning to rock
Three parts chemical - perverted shock
Five parts vegetable - sugar on cock
Yummy en bloc, it goes GO GO GO GO
DURR HURR D'ÊTRE BÉBÉ
Le parfum des problèmes d'essuyage
†FINGER
Crossfingercrossfingerdrivebyfingerdrivebyfingerbigbang
It's an exchange of sentimental symbols
I tell the mark of your beast to go fuck itself
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8. |
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9. |
(aka Bathtub Medley)
00:51
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a) VOMAN ROMIT
Voman Romit
b) KKK2D2
KKK2D2
c) LIKE A BABY'S DICK FUCKING AN APPLE
Like a baby's dick fucking an apple / APPLE
d) OFF A PIG FOR THE SAKE OF MY SEX LIFE
Off a pig for the sake of my sex life
Off a pig for the sake of my sex life - PIG
e) THE ARYAN CHRIST AS BIRTHDAY CLOWN
The Aryan Christ as birthday clown
f) POCKET-DIALING THE VICTIMS
They heard me boast about last night's roast of actual baby back ribs
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10. |
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Shit out my mouth with the sun in my face
Indian-style on carpet arson-charred
Blasting mustard water in summer
A disgusting miracle of digestion in the summertime
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11. |
Recreational Episiotomy
03:09
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Taint misbehavin'
Scissors or a razor
A relaxing expedition into sickness, a few laughs
Making one from two
It's just something to do:
Detaching the partition
Make a (w)hole out of two halves
So it is her objective to remove what's connective
Self-mutilation Goddess be: Recreational Episiotomy
Leisure endeavor, tissue to sever -
It's usually entertaining; self-inflicted
Making two to one, something just for fun
Unusually agonizing
Pain-addicted
So it is her objective to remove what's connective
One hole remains for sodomy
Recreational Episiotomy
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12. |
Ball Lightning
00:27
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Tucker State Prison Farm telephone line
Magneto to the Speedo
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13. |
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I’m Hitler in the boobyhatch
A fleeting breed of locust
Fucking on the barrelhead is only stealing focus
Cheap sex on the barrelhead
Cheap sex on the barrelhead
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14. |
Malathion Shillelagh
00:12
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15. |
Dirty Brass Pocket Watch
00:08
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(unintelligible)
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16. |
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We were hanging out downtown in Rage-Town's living room
He suddenly suggested, "Blackened Testicles In My Womb"
I countered, "Burn a Fatty with a Noose Around Your Neck"
Then "Bark at the Toilet and Barf at the Moon" was next
Here's some further titles that I won't write lyrics to:
"Cold Cum Balloons", "Skin Salad", and "I Totally Nailed This Jew"
"When You Think of Muff, Think Diver", "Wild Vagina Rider",
and "Tupac Died in the Valkenvania Mine Fire"
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17. |
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Another hacky douche trying to hog the camera lens
Barreling through and huffing that which was intended to cleanse
Secure a cure from ROTC and rock, high cornering entrepreneur
The crock and rot, the torr and cock are bordering on the obscure
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18. |
Frankenstein Foster Care
00:52
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You raise a baby
You praise, perplex it
Then kill the bratty
Betray, inject it
Kill it, kill it!
Kill it with your DICK
Winsome, the pieces
Sew back the parts
Live with the stitches in a pattern of h***ts
Then you KILL IT with your DICK
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19. |
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NAD PUMP OFFLINE
Nad-pump not found
ZURN
Zurn
TITS TO THE MUD
Tits to the mud, señor / tits to the MUUUUD
X-WORDED N-RATE
X-Worded N-Rate
QUIM DINNER
Quim dinner, Me getty so hungee baby
Getty so hun-gee, 'cuz...
TRÉS DOABLÉ
She's trés, trés do-ablé, do-ablé
BR'ER STEREO
My br'er stereo
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20. |
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Picking your poison
It's thickened, it's roiling
It's rollicking follicles - much too loud
Distracting your hackles - much too loud
Pay, own, ace.
Con mayola, no esta sola.
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21. |
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Big deal, I saw the moon - I'm really just surprised
I wanna find out who the fuck would take a pizza pie
and throw it straight in someone's eyes
Yeah, I see the stars - so I will make a wish:
To meet the foolish fool who uses foolish drool
to sauce a foolish pasta dish
Tutte le vostre base
Nemmeno Doom musica
Il Mr.T Italian mangiato mi...
Tutte le vostre base
Nemmeno Doom musica
Il Mr.T Italian mangiato mi palle
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22. |
Pap Reek / Sippy
01:16
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PAP REEK
Down the hatch with a shit-covered cock
Down your chin, cold sweaty ball rot
Greenish turd up inside urethra
Hairy cream tang, cumin and paprika
Fuck you, alligator
Eat shit, crocodile
Shut the fuck up, alligator
Suck my cock, crocodile
SIPPY
Walk
Choppin' up a stick o' chalk
Sippy, chokin' down a cuckoo cock
Sippy sup in Kona cup
I'm having trouble when I talk
't'oughtta be obvious shock
It's a California four o'clock
Sippy sup
I'm having trouble with my breathing
Vapor lock
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23. |
Edgar Allan Whoa
01:18
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The role of Poe has gone to Keanu
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24. |
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THE $25,000 PYRRHIC VICTORY
What's to be afraid of?
You grow your own protective headgear.
Things That Someone Digging In Their Heels Might Say.
I WANNA BE POISONED
Initiate of the vomit league
The spine of a boxer and the carny's hammers
Darkness is a wheel
Electrified fatigue, fatigue, fatigue
JELLY TOURNIQUET
It's illogical as hell
But predictable as fuck
It's a well-lit shopping mall
It's a hop skip and a jump
ICONIC JUDO AS SEX
MoOn fly meGa snIff
manhooD-hatInG tWaTs
OMen loaf Gym snIff
leDgE oN into hoTs
rum FeeS idioTic
We In it, ToaD
eYe - I discusS it
CyAnide's very borEd
soleMnly flaKinG
TyPhoid TeEn nada
tiN hooF revoLTing
AGony season Jaw
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25. |
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Smell the bile comin' up my throat
Smell the stale smoke on my coat
Fragile and helpless as a kite
Gotta gotta get a Pharsley Premacy tonight
"Bob" - SNED-MOAR-THEM pilspilspilspilspilspilspilspilspilspilspils
I didn't overdose, I'm overdosing
O blessed oblong curse, o blessed oblong curse
Liver chalkboard
The leak smells burnt and it wasn't even worth it
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26. |
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I'll tell you what I'd rather do (RAWR)
I'd rather fingerlick the Colonel
Amok, he cried sick and, unlucky, died stricken.
I'd rather fingerlick the Colonel
CHICKEN CHICKEN CHICKEN CHICKEN
Fingerlick the Colonel
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27. |
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That's not really a blast beat
That's not really a blast beat
You're physically incapable of one
You cannot be an artist in this genre if you
can't keep up with a Gatling gun
GUUUUUN
A computer - you fed it your drumming detritus
You'll rely on edits due to tendonitis
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28. |
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I set out to write some lyrics with intent to sicken
Violent gore and nothing more is what I should have written
But the worst I wrote was "carbonated Ragu sauce"
...that's not really grindcore
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29. |
Pamphletries
00:39
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When are you cosmic cowboys gonna get it through your head?
Smoking in a human face; are we really so dis-paired?
When are you cosmic cowboys gonna get it through your head?
Humble saucer of my race; you will never be prepared!
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30. |
Secretion Rainbow
00:21
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This is my housekeeper and her name is Aroma
Spinnbarkeit, tú es loco loción
Checking for some endometrial carcinoma
Spinnbarkeit, tú es loco loción
My little baby sister pronounces the H
Her feminist hero was Bessica Medlar Raiche
So come on, come on, make secretion rainbows with me.
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31. |
(aka Undersmell Medley)
00:30
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a) EYEFUCKING YOUR CASKET
Eyefucking your casket
b) TIE-DYED COFFIN
Sagebrush and sweat and brightly colored foreign objects
Extreme fundamentalists living in mold
c) FULLY TURGID
I drink in your embarrassment like S/M piss
d) TAINT OF DELECTATION (UK SURF)
She pushed me up against the wall
She found a treat behind my balls
e) YEN ON FIRE IN A VIRGIN'S MOUTH
Yen on fire in a virgin's mouth
f) SPENT FUCKBAGS
Spent fuckbags
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32. |
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NO HABLA QUEEF
No habla queef
The pussy air is leaky
Cunny fart language me no speakee
Words from lips without any teef
I don't understand
No habla queef
T.D.I.T.V.M.F.
Tupac died in the Valkenvania mine fire
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33. |
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(A) "Taser An Infant"
(B) "The Pedialectro-Disruptor"
(C) "Neuromuscular Naptime"
(D) "Infantiquassus"
- infant taser
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34. |
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PAROXYSM OF BLOODLUST
Been a month of Sundays since I HAD ONE.
This is a particularly BAD ONE.
Shower down upon whom it is DONE TO.
Scimitar and hammer, rope and GUN TOO.
RECREATIONAL EPISIOTOMY: MIAMI
Stash away the 'band in a utility knife
Behold, a drilling company; the rig is his wife
RecEpis: Miami 4 LYFE
Everybody gather 'round an old magazine
Consortium is powered by the lickin'-it-clean
It's the Kickin'-It-Team on a rickety beam
RecEpisRecEpisRecEpisRecEpisRecEpisRecEpis
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35. |
Я Toys Us?
00:56
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Hey man, what's the deal?
Tell the truth, baby - is love real?
Hey man, what's the deal?
TOYSUS CHЯIST TOYSUS TOYSUS CHЯIST TOYSUS CHЯIST
Daren't thar be fuck? Is it recognized?
Shall we saddle up? Is it made of lies?
Is it blood or luck filling up the shaft?
Don't you just secrete to ease a couple laughs?
Interactive drama queen cheapening
Retroactive reimagining
Devastate the heavenly memory
Renovate the fate of our history
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36. |
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37. |
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38. |
Fruit of the Doomed
04:21
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Mike Bender's underwear on eBay
Return to sender, service rendered, whattaya gonna say
Pissing up a typhoon and working all day
Mike Bender’s underwear on eBay
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39. |
( )
02:44
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(changing channels on the TV in the waiting room of the bonus tracks department)
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40. |
Zorevendi Deviggnihton
14:48
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TrashCanEagle Sacramento, California
Official label of XOC* and friends
* one of those video game music guys
If you like Born To Relax, you may also like:
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The songs are fantastic and fun - it's so easy for me to listen to this album on repeat. And the album cover is so great. The pun on the title just makes me chuckle every time I look at it. I really wish I could buy a physical copy of your other albums as well!
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If National Anthem was my national anthem I would be so proud I would've lied about my age to enlist.
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