Ottomon Way

by Theophagus

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about

{TCE-039}

THEOPHAGUS is the name of the solo songwriting/recording project I began at around age 16. From 1992-2002 I recorded roughly 100 hours of material, most of it on my Yamaha MT8X 8-track cassette recorder.

This is the second in a series of archival collections - each one is about an hour long. Every song has been redigitized, rebuilt, remixed, and remastered directly from the original cassettes.

NOTE: "Ottomon" is not a typo; it's the name of the street I lived on when Theophagus was started back in 1992. The cover photo is of my house.

(While we at Optical Pies Recorders have made every effort possible to heighten and augment the fidelity, the quality in places might seem lacking. Probably because I was a teenager and recorded everything through crappy distortion and phaser pedals.)

credits

released July 8, 2015

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TrashCanEagle Sacramento, California

Official label of XOC* and friends


* one of those video game music guys

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Track Name: Penelope Antelope
PENELOPE ANTELOPE

Like the sands through the hourglass
These are the days of my ass
Like when I used to smoke grass
Thinkin' what I'd become
Thinkin' what I'd want to be
Penelope Antelope
Track Name: Dioretsa
DIORETSA

We did it Indian-style
Don't think of touchin' that dial
A product of another time
Exclamatory grime
When there was four in the square we took what we could get there
A multi-colored brain-stain
The Den of Thumbwar Sprain
Dioretsa, Dioromeh
A box of brightly colored rocks
We call it nirvana
[MISSING VERSE:
Self-amplifying disease, appointed head Pathetes
The aura went and bored a hole
Right through the stick and into my soul]
And when you get to the point when you look into the joint
Where you used to have a ball, you realize that's all
Track Name: Haze the Rookie
HAZE THE ROOKIE

Looky, looky, toss the cookie
Raise the phase and haze the rookie
Looky, looky, toss the cookie
Raise the phase and haze the rookie
Hover, hover up above her
Hover, hover up above her
Amen.
Track Name: You've Got To Choose
YOU'VE GOT TO CHOOSE

You've got to choose
Me... or ACID!
Track Name: Lesbier Wünschen Mein Semenzellen
LESBIER WÜNSCHEN MEIN SEMENZELLEN

The eggs chased me 'round the pan
So I jumped into the fire
I was feelin' like a man and preachin' to the choir
Dreamin' of a moonlit night
Turkey baster by the candlelight
Speculum and a glass of wine
What a romantic time
Track Name: Textbook Definition Heart
TEXTBOOK DEFINITION HEART

I will always argue
That there's more to it than what is in your head
I've been thinkin' 'bout the way you said
Cogito ergo sum
And the sum of all our parts
But look at me feign intelligence
With my textbook heart
There's no quote around
That could just shatter all my notions all at once
I've been wearing a lot of hats that all say DUNCE
It's on your sleeve, right under your chip
And this is how it starts
You're the corner of passion versus textbook definition heart
See the redbird fly across the sky
And see the angry man bow down
I've been thinkin' 'bout loyalty
Tempus edax rerum
And the sum of all our time
But look at me creatively
With my textbook rhyme
There's no quote around
That could just lift my body straight up to the stars
I've been crying in the dark
And you've been wrecking cars
Magical vestibule
Emotional bustle of whimsical muscle
Exactly what is it you're trying to say?
Track Name: Rubber Balls & Liquor [acoustic version]
RUBBER BALLS & LIQUOR

I've got an agenda - can I say this?
I'm clutchin' a dream and takin' a piss
I'm Opium Taylor, so gimme a kiss
And ask me what I ate
Ask me to remember and I'll give it a try
Back in the day when there was no reason why
When I say "smoke" you're gonna say "how high?"
And all these things I hate
Ask me what I did to her when I was a kid
Yes sir
You will mark the skid before my words
I had these on my plate; we will do this on our date.
There's no way to escape fate
So ask me what I ate
Track Name: The Cold Shoulder
THE COLD SHOULDER

With a brain like a bucket of shit
You're a specimen, horrid and sick
My morning's corroded and cold
And I can't help but not feel old
I just can't help but escape these Cold Shoulder Blues
But let's just keep drivin'...
You pilot a body that seems to be soaked to the wood with dreams
A violet your eyes didn't see
(But smoked all it could with me)
You heard restlessness from me, maybe...
But I tell you I slept like a baby
...with a diaper that's just overflowed
So can we just get on the road?
Track Name: Rubber Balls & Liquor [big band version]
RUBBER BALLS & LIQUOR

I've got an agenda - can I say this?
I'm clutchin' a dream and takin' a piss
I'm Opium Taylor, so gimme a kiss
And ask me what I ate
Ask me to remember and I'll give it a try
Back in the day when there was no reason why
When I say "smoke" you're gonna say "how high?"
And all these things I hate
Ask me what I did to her when I was a kid
Yes sir
You will mark the skid before my words
I had these on my plate; we will do this on our date.
There's no way to escape fate
So ask me what I ate
Track Name: Smoking Crater
SMOKING CRATER

Me and a gun, guessing no fun
Right then and there, setting the sun
Gushing the glands, warm in my hands
Hollow'd of smoke - snap rubber bands
Stink in the air, reality bare
Everything done - be what I wear
Thinking is broke
Started a joke
Funnel of sands started to choke
Smoking crater in the rear view mirror
Still alive, but somehow will not hear her
See you later in the dark of slumber
Only five, but five's my lucky number
Parallel place, distinctive face
Fat, snubnosed friend, false-started race
Everything passed, going so fast
or am I just slow to know I'm the last?
Finding no end - frayed ones to tend
Nothing to pace - synapses bend
Nowhere to go - defensive foe
Under the mast: let it be so
Track Name: I'd Like To Teach The World To Pay
I'D LIKE TO TEACH THE WORLD TO PAY

A red dress and a black eye
The Loose Change Row blues
With archival allergies
A mountain bike and dress shoes
Don't talk to me about the crossroads
When the forking paths look like thighs
Don't try and pin your shit on me
It won't stick, only stain
I'd like to teach the world to pay
A black mess on the red eye
The tour charter by the dawn
When it hits the grass burning,
my bedroom light will be left on
Don't talk to me about nothin' at all
When the fuckin' flames are in my eyes
You should know better than to hang out with meat
A unicycle brain and a roadblock street
Track Name: Love in Amber Fields
LOVE IN AMBER FIELDS

I hold the key that you threw away when you locked them up yesterday
When I look inside myself I'm not surprised to see:
A big floating brain staring back at me
Help me find the light so reclusive
Show me all the things that are exclusive
to life inside a photo album cover
Love in amber fields, a gift of a flower
NONE SHALL COMPROMISE MY TREACHEROUS POWER
I'm not surprised, I'm not surprised as I look down:
The girl next door next time I leave town
Track Name: Ashram Zero [demo sketch]
ASHRAM ZERO

Zero, givin' you the ashram zero
Givin' you the ashram zero
Track Name: Apartments All Over This Town
APARTMENTS ALL OVER THIS TOWN

Oh, I've sat and sweated my life away while in a neighboring dimension
and rode in cold to freedom on a ten-speed
Relieve the tension
and I've been around and I've met a few people
that helped me try to feel down
and there's been quite a few wacky drunken misadventures
in apartments all over this town
Oh, I've sat at the table and smoked a whole lot
and I've had my share to drink in the past
The woman doing laundry's got a real short shirt
and a pair of cut-off sweats on her ass
We had to jump around to the radio music
and the drug connection, dealers renown
And I've made myself at home and had a lot of deep despair
in apartments all over this town
Yes, I've been through the parties and the vomit and the showers
And the pass-outs and bummed rides home
And every single beer, it meant I needed me another
Not that I was getting sick all alone
I ate the week-old bacon to the stare of strobe light glare
And the gang bang slut enters in her gown
And they shot unloaded cannons New Year's Day
when I was drunk outside apartments all over this town
Yes, I drank a lot of gin and I tried to slip it in
in apartments all over this town
and there's been quite a few wacky drunken misadventures
in apartments all over this town
Track Name: Hose Water
HOSE WATER

Shake 'er easy, Jersey girl - Miss April May June
Your disco-dipsomania will get you nowhere soon
You know I wanna be good and I wanna be cool
Don't wanna go to school
I wanna be clean, I want the neighbor's daughter
I wanna drink hose water
Desperation and cheap excuse, I felt like dyin'
Memory and the flesh of geese
When I wrote this, I was fryin'
Or does he really care? What's my raison d'être?*
You've got a load in your pants and whiskey in your hair
I know you, little rakehelly, your politics of fun
Scorin' with another's girl
The car seat and the sun
I don't care for the stars in her eyes
And I see how she cries when I come to her place
With the words and the madman's face

* pronunciation=lol
Track Name: Blau
BLAU

Es ist alles gutte [sic] Frau
Ich bin scheiss und ich bin blau
Track Name: Linnea [demo sketch]
LINNEA

I was only half in bloom
You were only half entombed
When I hung your picture in my room
My second year of junior high, I had your blood in my eye
The love I had for others was a lie
Linnea, Linnea
A healthy respect for your gore
Linnea, Linnea
...and what's more
Track Name: Kernel
KERNEL

A soft-spoken man from Brazil, Indiana
with a bow tie and a dream died in Coronado, California
Twenty-four years to perfection and sixty-three years to fame
Goodbye, entrepreneur - Orville was his name
Orville was his name