Get all 90 TrashCanEagle releases available on Bandcamp and save 50%.
Includes unlimited streaming via the free Bandcamp app, plus high-quality downloads of WW†JD?, Xoc Like An Egyptian, Sounds For the Fall, Forestry [single], The Great Trim Wrangle, Heavy Family Disk 5-D, Heavy Family Disk 5-C, Heavy Family Disk 5-B, and 82 more.
1. |
||||
|
SODOMIZE A CORPSE'S FACE ON CHRISTMAS EVE
Sodomize a corpse's face, sodomize a corpse's face
Sodomize a corpse's face on Christmas Eve
Liquor bought, drink a lot
Go to bed, wake up dead
Pumping hips on your lips
Horny beast on the deceased
Sodomize a corpse's face, sodomize a corpse's face
Sodomize a corpse's face on Christmas Eve
Dick like horse in mouth of corpse
Semen coats departed throat
Coffin sin of balls on chin
Oral corpus
Rigor mortis
It's so gorgeous
Squeak the chorus like a porpoise
|
||||
2. |
Napalm Tannenbaum
00:55
|
|||
|
NAPALM TANNENBAUM
You took your whole family
To go pick out a Christmas tree
Tannenbaum, I hate that song
How's about a dirty bomb
Rows and rows of Christmas trees
Ignite and smolder instantly
Flaming children in a maze
Green inferno blocks their way
Smoke fills up December sky
Flesh is boiling as you die
Now I have a blackened tree
Made out of your family
|
||||
3. |
Secret Santa
01:20
|
|||
|
SECRET SANTA
I know you know I'm Santa, though people call me Steve
I'm parked across the street from your house Christmas Eve
I watch you wrapping presents, the children's Christmas loot
I jerk behind the wheel and stain my Santa suit
Soon I'll take your children and put them in a sack
Hang it from a tree and beat it with a bat
I'll snatch away your husband, bind his hands and feet
Chain him to my bumper then sleigh ride down your street
I know you know I'm Santa, no matter what you say
I'm parked across the street for all of Christmas day
I'll take you to my workshop, a crawlspace with no laws
Now you'll keep the secret that you're my Mrs. Claus
You're my Mrs. Claus
You're my Mrs. Claus
I'm checking my list, and I know that I've been naughty
(with a razor at my wrist)
Your hubby won't be missed, and they'll never find the body
(it's cut up and wrapped as gifts)
A black Christmas wreath and a stocking full of teeth
Rest in peace
|
||||
4. |
||||
|
DRAWN AND QUARTERED ON XMAS
We sing Christmas carols while you whimper, scream and beg
Heavy duty nylon rope around your arms and legs
All four limbs each tied to reindeer, then we make them run
Ripped apart on Christmas Eve in front of everyone
|
||||
5. |
Chimney Surprise
00:11
|
|||
|
CHIMNEY SURPRISE
A rusty wolf trap in the fireplace
I just can't wait to see that fucker's face
|
||||
6. |
Feliz Navidump
00:33
|
|||
|
FELIZ NAVIDUMP
Caca para un regalo
Caca para un regalo
Caca para un regalo
Eso es lo que obtienes
I want to wish you a piece of shit-mas
I want to wish you a piece of shit-mas
I want to wish you a piece of shit-mas
And it comes from where I fart
|
||||
7. |
||||
|
BEATEN WITH A STOCKING FULL OF DILDOS
Christmas morning
Without warning
Here comes a stocking full of dildos!
Violent surprise
Stockings oversized
It took a lot of dongs to fill those!
The kids were sleeping
Now they're weeping
"Why, dad, why you wanna hit us?"
He laughs with glee,
And mercilessly
Beats them, screaming, "Merry Christmas!"
|
||||
8. |
Bukkake Nog
00:09
|
|||
|
BUKKAKE NOG
Christmas day, she'll
take a facial
Suck like a champ, get fucked like a dog
The jissem of the elves is hot egg nog
...oh yes it is
|
||||
9. |
Venereal Miracle
00:56
|
|||
|
VENEREAL MIRACLE
I fucked this Jewish girl without a rubber on
I only used a drop of lube - my cock burned eight nights long
|
||||
10. |
Minstrel Kringle
00:59
|
|||
|
MINSTREL KRINGLE (Don't Even Mention Zwarte Piet)
He fell down the chimney, covered in soot
On his lips, white paint he put
Blackface Santa, he make joke
about fried chicken and being broke
He burned crosses on the lawns o'
families celebrating Kwanzaa
He pissed them off with a racist stunt
involving a wrapping paper blunt
The Kwanzaa hymnals in his mouth
are taken from "Song of the South"
An angry mob screaming and yellin'
'cause Santa made a joke about a watermelon
Edgy racial humor's not
the strong suit of this red-suit twat
HE'S ABOUT TO GET KNOCKED THE FUCK OUT!
K-Kris-Kringle's death looms near
Reindeer will not help you here
They caught Santa trying to flee
They lynched him from a Christmas tree
|
||||
11. |
Snowhuff Tinselpants
00:59
|
|||
|
SNOWHUFF TINSELPANTS
A brown paper bag and a can of spray snow
A tinsel loincloth that sparkles and glows
Shitting self from pleasure, a holiday menace
Huff 'til I collapse into piles of presents
|
||||
12. |
Hanukkah Roulette
00:40
|
|||
|
HANUKKAH ROULETTE
We sit around a table
and spin a little dreidel
and where it lands
with guns in hands
We find out if it's fatal
NUN - spin the cylinder, pull trigger once
GIMEL - spin the cylinder, pull trigger twice
HEI - put the gun down, don't pull at all
SHIN - spin the cylinder, pull until you fall
|
||||
13. |
||||
|
I TOOK A SHIT IN A SALVATION ARMY DONATION KETTLE
I took a shit in the bucket
then I ran around the corner and hid
I usually don't give a shit
but this Christmas I did
|
||||
14. |
||||
|
NATIVITY SCENE BESTIALITY PARTY
Witness the birth of a miraculous child
Gather around, it's time to get wild
This heartwarming scene is about to get stranger
The shitholes of goats and of sheep are in danger
The virgin is sleeping on hay that is piled
The animals sense us and start to get riled
Here we come naked, three wise anal rangers
Ready to cornhole everything in the manger
|
||||
TrashCanEagle Sacramento, California
Official label of XOC* and friends
* one of those video game music guys
If you like Thanks For Ruining Christmas, you may also like:
Bossies Play Bosses: A Tribute to Matt Wood
by mig50
supported by 9 fans who also own “Thanks For Ruining Christmas”
Oh neat I'm in high school again
go to album
Exceptional Goblins
by Ian Cowell
supported by 8 fans who also own “Thanks For Ruining Christmas”
This whole album is solid VGM gold from start to finish, but the Mario Land track is especially fun and the Chrono Trigger track gives me chills every time. Worth the price for just those alone.
go to album
Double Ferrari
by Double Ferrari
supported by 8 fans who also own “Thanks For Ruining Christmas”
If National Anthem was my national anthem I would be so proud I would've lied about my age to enlist.
go to album
Tres Aeropuertos Juntos
by XNIDA
Argentinian producer XNIDA makes dense experimental techno that burbles with nervous modular synth lines and churns with industrial rhythms.
go to album
A Very Too Many Zooz Xmas
by Too Many Zooz
Too Many Zooz return with holiday classics performed in their own inimitable style.
go to album
First Love 初恋 : Debut Album and Demo Tracks
by Space Streakings
Released via experimental institution Skin Graft, “First Love” is the perfect reintroduction to one of Japan’s most criminally underrated noise-rock bands.
go to album
Bat Out of HAL
by Kirby's Dream Band
supported by 7 fans who also own “Thanks For Ruining Christmas”
The songs are fantastic and fun - it's so easy for me to listen to this album on repeat. And the album cover is so great. The pun on the title just makes me chuckle every time I look at it. I really wish I could buy a physical copy of your other albums as well!
go to album
